How can you talk to skeptics about the power and value of diversity without producing the opposite effect, but instead planting a seed of change? Here are some tips for doing so with empathy, curiosity, respect for differing views, and without moralizing.<\/p>\n<\/div>
1. Understand Needs
<\/h2><\/div>As Marshall Rosenberg, creator of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), said:<\/p>\n<\/div>
![](\"https:\/\/diversityhub.pl\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/ico-quote-red.svg\" "\\"ico-quote-red\\"")
<\/span><\/div>“Everything people do is an attempt to meet their needs.”<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
Instead of immediately responding with an argument or counterpoint, pause and consider what needs might be behind what the other person is saying. Perhaps skepticism toward DEI stems from a need for security \u2013 fear that change threatens the status quo. Or it could be a need to feel valued \u2013 a worry that \u201cnew\u201d initiatives will overlook those in the majority. <\/p>\n
Ask questions to uncover these needs:<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat concerns you most about this topic?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cWhat experiences shaped your perspective?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
This approach builds bridges and creates space for a conversation based on mutual respect and understanding.
\n<\/i><\/p>\n<\/div>2. Speak in Simple Language and Practice Inclusive Communication
<\/h2><\/div>DEI language is often full of specialized terms that can intimidate or discourage people. Instead of talking about \u201cmicroaggressions\u201d or \u201cintersectionality,\u201d try explaining the topic as you would to a friend. Simple language opens doors to dialogue and is often more persuasive than jargon or statistics. As Bren\u00e9 Brown reminds us: \u201cClarity is kindness.\u201d <\/p>\n
Inclusive communication is more than simple language. It\u2019s also awareness that words can exclude or invite. It involves:<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Avoiding terms that might hurt or marginalize (e.g., \u201cnormal employee\u201d vs. \u201cneurotypical employee\u201d)<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Using neutral language forms where possible<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Making space for diverse identities, for example by using the names and pronouns people choose<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
It\u2019s also important not to assume what\u2019s best for someone. Not every woman prefers feminine forms of words; for some it matters, for others it doesn\u2019t. Therefore, it\u2019s better to ask: <\/p>\n
\u201cHow would you like me to refer to your role?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cWhich language do you prefer I use?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
Inclusive communication is primarily about listening and flexibility \u2013 not imposing or \u201ccorrecting\u201d language, but ensuring no one is excluded, fostering respect, and responding to needs..<\/p>\n<\/div>
3. Tailor Your Message to the Values of the Listener
<\/h2><\/div>Not everyone will be convinced by the same arguments. Some value numbers and business efficiency \u2013 for them, cite data showing that diverse teams perform better, are more innovative, and more creative. Others care about community and fairness \u2013 for them, emphasize that inclusivity is simply honesty and equal opportunity. <\/p>\n
Ask yourself:<\/p>\n<\/div>
<\/span><\/div>\u201cWhat matters to this person, and how can I respect that in the conversation?\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
This is not manipulation; it\u2019s respect and tailoring communication to the audience. It encourages getting to know the other person and understanding their needs and values \u2013 the best starting point for building a relationship..<\/p>\n<\/div>
4. Tell Stories \u2013 Don\u2019t Just Lecture
<\/h2><\/div>A common mistake in DEI conversations is \u201clecturing\u201d from a teacher\u2019s perspective. With skeptical audiences, this often backfires, as no one likes being lectured. Storytelling and listening to stories is much more effective. Share your journey: how you experienced the need for diversity, how your thinking changed.
But don\u2019t stop at your story. Listening to others\u2019 experiences is one of the best ways to learn \u2013 it shows a world from a perspective you don\u2019t know. Stories have power: they teach empathy and demonstrate that behind statistics and concepts are real people.<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Invite others to share their experiences \u2013 not to \u201cconvince\u201d anyone, but to understand each other.<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Ask questions: \u201cWhat touched you most about this story?\u201d \u201cHow would you feel in that person\u2019s shoes?\u201d<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Use storytelling in team meetings, workshops, or everyday work.<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
Authenticity matters \u2013 showing that everyone is learning engages curiosity and participation.<\/p>\n<\/div>
5. Curiosity as a Bridge \u2013 Building a Culture of Openness<\/h2><\/div>One of the best things you can do in a DEI conversation is nurture curiosity. Instead of thinking, \u201cI must convince you,\u201d ask: <\/p>\n
\u201cWhat made you form this opinion?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cWhat are your experiences with this topic?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
Curiosity doesn\u2019t judge; it asks. It opens doors to honest dialogue.<\/p>\n
Ways to develop curiosity:<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Seek contact with people who are \u201cdifferent\u201d \u2013 think differently, come from other cultures, or have different identities<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Participate in events that broaden horizons \u2013 intercultural workshops, storytelling sessions, debates<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Listen to diverse stories, not just those that confirm your beliefs<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Ask questions and be willing to change your mind \u2013 curiosity is both asking and being ready to accept new perspectives<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
Organizations aiming to build a culture of diversity and inclusive leadership can:<\/p>\n
<\/b><\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Organize DEI workshops and advisory services<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Create spaces for conversation and questions \u2013 storytelling meetings or cross-mentoring<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Support programs that facilitate contact with minority groups (e.g., ERG networks)<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
Exposing yourself (and others) to different experiences and perspectives is the best way to break stereotypes and broaden your worldview. True curiosity means being willing to encounter the unfamiliar and different.<\/p>\n<\/div>
6. Step into Others\u2019 Shoes \u2013 Empathy Through Experience<\/h2><\/div>As Harper Lee, author of To Kill a Mockingbird, said:<\/p>\n<\/div>
<\/span><\/div>“You never really understand a person until you walk around in their shoes.”<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
It is valuable to create spaces that allow people to experience other perspectives, for example:<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Simulations of how neurodiverse people perceive the world<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Storytelling sessions with minority groups, Living Libraries<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Intercultural workshops<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
Learning through experience is safe and effective: it allows seeing the world through someone else\u2019s eyes without judgment or fear. Contact with the \u201cother\u201d nurtures curiosity and breaks stereotypes, turning abstract concepts into real people \u2013 with their smile, fatigue, talent, and story.<\/p>\n<\/div>
7. Bezpiecze\u0144stwo psychologiczne \u2013 fundament rozm\u00f3w o Psychological Safety \u2013 The Foundation for DEI Conversations<\/h2><\/div>Psychological safety is when employees feel safe to speak their minds without fear of ridicule, punishment, or exclusion. In DEI conversations, this is crucial. How can we discuss identity-related issues \u2013 often difficult, controversial, or emotional \u2013 if people don\u2019t feel safe to open up? <\/p>\n
In the DEI context, psychological safety means the right to:<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Express doubts<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Hold a different opinion<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Say \u201cI don\u2019t know\u201d without fear of judgment<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
Amy Edmondson, who introduced the concept of psychological safety, said:<\/p>\n<\/div>
<\/span><\/div>“Humility does not mean false modesty. It is simply acknowledging that we don\u2019t have all the answers and certainly no crystal ball. Research shows that when leaders show humility, teams engage in more learning behaviors.”<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
DEI conversations need spaces where every voice matters \u2013 even if it differs. Intellectual humility in leaders is key: readiness to admit: : <\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t have all the answers. I want to hear your perspective.\u201d <\/i><\/p>\n<\/div>This approach underpins inclusive leadership, which not only encourages diversity but actively draws from it. Leaders who model openness and curiosity create a culture where DEI conversations become bridges to genuine understanding, making diversity a true value.<\/p>\n<\/div>
8. Understand Privilege<\/h2><\/div>DEI discussions often touch on privilege. This word can evoke emotions \u2013 no one likes being told, \u201cyou have it easier.\u201d But privilege is not blame or guilt; it is a fact worth recognizing. <\/p>\n
Privilege is what you take for granted as normal. Examples include:<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Not worrying that someone at work will mock your accent<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Finding your identity reflected in official documents<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Feeling that a disability doesn\u2019t block career opportunities.<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
Talking about privilege shows that DEI is not ideology but everyday reality. What is \u201cnormal\u201d and easy for one person may not be for another. Discussing privilege is not about blame, but understanding \u2013 laying the foundation for respect and allyship. Concrete, everyday examples help those outside the DEI bubble see how privilege affects access to education, healthcare, and employment. Recognizing privilege is not shameful; it can be a powerful tool for allyship.<\/p>\n
DEI conversations aren\u2019t about who is right or who has it better. They are about seeing what we can do so no one feels \u201cless important.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>
9. Everyday Support \u2013 Everyone Can Be an Ally<\/h2><\/div>You don\u2019t need to be a DEI expert or a leader to create space for diversity. Everyday actions matter:<\/p>\n<\/div>
- <\/i><\/span>Don\u2019t laugh at exclusive jokes<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Notice voices that are usually less heard<\/div><\/li>
- <\/i><\/span>Support colleagues returning from parental leave or long absences due to caregiving<\/div><\/li><\/ul>
DEI conversations and supporting diversity are not just about grand strategies or policies. Often, they are about small, everyday gestures and inclusive habits that build a culture of belonging. <\/p>\n
Co wa\u017cne \u2013 to w\u0142a\u015bnie te ma\u0142e rzeczy potrafi\u0105 przem\u00f3wi\u0107 do sceptyk\u00f3w. Bo o ile polityki i strategie mog\u0105 wydawa\u0107 si\u0119 im obce i dalekie, o tyle drobne, \u017cyczliwe gesty i proste s\u0142owa w codziennym \u017cyciu s\u0105 czym\u015b, co trafia do ka\u017cdego z nas. <\/p>\n
These small actions often resonate with skeptics. Policies and strategies may seem distant, but simple, kind gestures in everyday life reach everyone. Allyship is not occasional support; it\u2019s a choice: <\/p>\n
\u201cI want everyone around me to feel that their perspective matters.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n
Through these small acts, daily listening, and sensitivity, DEI stops being theory and becomes part of how we work and live together. These small, everyday actions are the real fuel for building a culture of belonging.<\/p>\n<\/div>
Summary: Conversation That Builds Bridges<\/h2><\/div>DEI conversations can be challenging but don\u2019t have to be. Lead them with empathy, curiosity, and respect. <\/p>\n
It\u2019s not about being right \u2013 it\u2019s about building relationships.<\/p>\n
Change begins not with a slogan but with the question: \u201cWhat moves you about this topic?\u201d and the willingness to truly listen to the answer.<\/p>\n
At Diversity Hub, we listen and hear diverse voices. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>
As Marshall Rosenberg, creator of Nonviolent Communication (NVC), said:<\/p>\n<\/div>
<\/span><\/div>“Everything people do is an attempt to meet their needs.”<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>
Instead of immediately responding with an argument or counterpoint, pause and consider what needs might be behind what the other person is saying. Perhaps skepticism toward DEI stems from a need for security \u2013 fear that change threatens the status quo. Or it could be a need to feel valued \u2013 a worry that \u201cnew\u201d initiatives will overlook those in the majority. <\/p>\n
Ask questions to uncover these needs:<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat concerns you most about this topic?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
\u201cWhat experiences shaped your perspective?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n
This approach builds bridges and creates space for a conversation based on mutual respect and understanding. DEI language is often full of specialized terms that can intimidate or discourage people. Instead of talking about \u201cmicroaggressions\u201d or \u201cintersectionality,\u201d try explaining the topic as you would to a friend. Simple language opens doors to dialogue and is often more persuasive than jargon or statistics. As Bren\u00e9 Brown reminds us: \u201cClarity is kindness.\u201d <\/p>\n Inclusive communication is more than simple language. It\u2019s also awareness that words can exclude or invite. It involves:<\/p>\n<\/div> It\u2019s also important not to assume what\u2019s best for someone. Not every woman prefers feminine forms of words; for some it matters, for others it doesn\u2019t. Therefore, it\u2019s better to ask: <\/p>\n \u201cHow would you like me to refer to your role?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n \u201cWhich language do you prefer I use?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n Inclusive communication is primarily about listening and flexibility \u2013 not imposing or \u201ccorrecting\u201d language, but ensuring no one is excluded, fostering respect, and responding to needs..<\/p>\n<\/div> Not everyone will be convinced by the same arguments. Some value numbers and business efficiency \u2013 for them, cite data showing that diverse teams perform better, are more innovative, and more creative. Others care about community and fairness \u2013 for them, emphasize that inclusivity is simply honesty and equal opportunity. <\/p>\n Ask yourself:<\/p>\n<\/div> \u201cWhat matters to this person, and how can I respect that in the conversation?\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div> This is not manipulation; it\u2019s respect and tailoring communication to the audience. It encourages getting to know the other person and understanding their needs and values \u2013 the best starting point for building a relationship..<\/p>\n<\/div> A common mistake in DEI conversations is \u201clecturing\u201d from a teacher\u2019s perspective. With skeptical audiences, this often backfires, as no one likes being lectured. Storytelling and listening to stories is much more effective. Share your journey: how you experienced the need for diversity, how your thinking changed. Authenticity matters \u2013 showing that everyone is learning engages curiosity and participation.<\/p>\n<\/div> One of the best things you can do in a DEI conversation is nurture curiosity. Instead of thinking, \u201cI must convince you,\u201d ask: <\/p>\n \u201cWhat made you form this opinion?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n \u201cWhat are your experiences with this topic?\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n Curiosity doesn\u2019t judge; it asks. It opens doors to honest dialogue.<\/p>\n Ways to develop curiosity:<\/p>\n<\/div> Organizations aiming to build a culture of diversity and inclusive leadership can:<\/p>\n <\/b><\/p>\n<\/div> Exposing yourself (and others) to different experiences and perspectives is the best way to break stereotypes and broaden your worldview. True curiosity means being willing to encounter the unfamiliar and different.<\/p>\n<\/div> As Harper Lee, author of To Kill a Mockingbird, said:<\/p>\n<\/div> “You never really understand a person until you walk around in their shoes.”<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div> It is valuable to create spaces that allow people to experience other perspectives, for example:<\/p>\n<\/div> Learning through experience is safe and effective: it allows seeing the world through someone else\u2019s eyes without judgment or fear. Contact with the \u201cother\u201d nurtures curiosity and breaks stereotypes, turning abstract concepts into real people \u2013 with their smile, fatigue, talent, and story.<\/p>\n<\/div> Psychological safety is when employees feel safe to speak their minds without fear of ridicule, punishment, or exclusion. In DEI conversations, this is crucial. How can we discuss identity-related issues \u2013 often difficult, controversial, or emotional \u2013 if people don\u2019t feel safe to open up? <\/p>\n In the DEI context, psychological safety means the right to:<\/p>\n<\/div> Amy Edmondson, who introduced the concept of psychological safety, said:<\/p>\n<\/div> “Humility does not mean false modesty. It is simply acknowledging that we don\u2019t have all the answers and certainly no crystal ball. Research shows that when leaders show humility, teams engage in more learning behaviors.”<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div> DEI conversations need spaces where every voice matters \u2013 even if it differs. Intellectual humility in leaders is key: readiness to admit: : <\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t have all the answers. I want to hear your perspective.\u201d <\/i><\/p>\n<\/div> This approach underpins inclusive leadership, which not only encourages diversity but actively draws from it. Leaders who model openness and curiosity create a culture where DEI conversations become bridges to genuine understanding, making diversity a true value.<\/p>\n<\/div> DEI discussions often touch on privilege. This word can evoke emotions \u2013 no one likes being told, \u201cyou have it easier.\u201d But privilege is not blame or guilt; it is a fact worth recognizing. <\/p>\n Privilege is what you take for granted as normal. Examples include:<\/p>\n<\/div> Talking about privilege shows that DEI is not ideology but everyday reality. What is \u201cnormal\u201d and easy for one person may not be for another. Discussing privilege is not about blame, but understanding \u2013 laying the foundation for respect and allyship. Concrete, everyday examples help those outside the DEI bubble see how privilege affects access to education, healthcare, and employment. Recognizing privilege is not shameful; it can be a powerful tool for allyship.<\/p>\n DEI conversations aren\u2019t about who is right or who has it better. They are about seeing what we can do so no one feels \u201cless important.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div> You don\u2019t need to be a DEI expert or a leader to create space for diversity. Everyday actions matter:<\/p>\n<\/div> DEI conversations and supporting diversity are not just about grand strategies or policies. Often, they are about small, everyday gestures and inclusive habits that build a culture of belonging. <\/p>\n Co wa\u017cne \u2013 to w\u0142a\u015bnie te ma\u0142e rzeczy potrafi\u0105 przem\u00f3wi\u0107 do sceptyk\u00f3w. Bo o ile polityki i strategie mog\u0105 wydawa\u0107 si\u0119 im obce i dalekie, o tyle drobne, \u017cyczliwe gesty i proste s\u0142owa w codziennym \u017cyciu s\u0105 czym\u015b, co trafia do ka\u017cdego z nas. <\/p>\n These small actions often resonate with skeptics. Policies and strategies may seem distant, but simple, kind gestures in everyday life reach everyone. Allyship is not occasional support; it\u2019s a choice: <\/p>\n \u201cI want everyone around me to feel that their perspective matters.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n Through these small acts, daily listening, and sensitivity, DEI stops being theory and becomes part of how we work and live together. These small, everyday actions are the real fuel for building a culture of belonging.<\/p>\n<\/div> DEI conversations can be challenging but don\u2019t have to be. Lead them with empathy, curiosity, and respect. <\/p>\n It\u2019s not about being right \u2013 it\u2019s about building relationships.<\/p>\n Change begins not with a slogan but with the question: \u201cWhat moves you about this topic?\u201d and the willingness to truly listen to the answer.<\/p>\n At Diversity Hub, we listen and hear diverse voices. <\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>
\n<\/i><\/p>\n<\/div>2. Speak in Simple Language and Practice Inclusive Communication
<\/h2><\/div>3. Tailor Your Message to the Values of the Listener
<\/h2><\/div><\/span><\/div>4. Tell Stories \u2013 Don\u2019t Just Lecture
<\/h2><\/div>
But don\u2019t stop at your story. Listening to others\u2019 experiences is one of the best ways to learn \u2013 it shows a world from a perspective you don\u2019t know. Stories have power: they teach empathy and demonstrate that behind statistics and concepts are real people.<\/p>\n<\/div>5. Curiosity as a Bridge \u2013 Building a Culture of Openness<\/h2><\/div>
6. Step into Others\u2019 Shoes \u2013 Empathy Through Experience<\/h2><\/div>
<\/span><\/div>7. Bezpiecze\u0144stwo psychologiczne \u2013 fundament rozm\u00f3w o Psychological Safety \u2013 The Foundation for DEI Conversations<\/h2><\/div>
<\/span><\/div>8. Understand Privilege<\/h2><\/div>
9. Everyday Support \u2013 Everyone Can Be an Ally<\/h2><\/div>
Summary: Conversation That Builds Bridges<\/h2><\/div>